Paidtoclick.in

Monday, February 23, 2009

Discouragement.


Everyone will have their share of discouragement at some point in their lifetime.

Discouragement happens in all areas of life. An employee puts in his best to ensure his department achieves success, only to get a damaging response instead of a good appraisal from his superior. A woman’s marriage dreams end when her husband is unfaithful. She truly feels the pangs of discouragement. A couple suffers their second miscarriage while trying to create a family. These people all deal with discouragement differently, but some may become so discouraged, so distressed and as a result may attempt to take their own lives.

The root word of discouragement is courage so it should only make sense that the feelings associated with failure and rejection often try to deal a blow to your inner source of courage. Unfortunately, these emotions can cripple you to the point where you avoid taking small risks that have huge potential rewards.Life is full of failures, rejection and more than a fair share of discouragement. I believe that the difference in how persistent people are often comes down to how they handle the discouragement that comes from the same situation. While some people can immediately brush themselves off, others can enter a negative cycle of thoughts that persists for weeks, months or even years.

"Develop success from failures. Discouragement and failure are two of the surest stepping stones to success. "Dale Carnegie

"Defeat should never be a source of discouragement, but rather a fresh stimulus." Bishop Robert South

80 comments:

Anonymous said...

Thank you for writing this piece about discouragement.
I was just told that an article I was going to do was stolen by a staff writer,
so now I have to find another venue for the piece, and I was feeling very discouraged that
an editor would leave me out in the cold like that, and favor a staff writer, when I know
I can do a better job on this particular article.
But after reading your blog, I feel better, and I am going to try to make lemonade out of lemons
and do the piece for another publication.
Thanks again for the logical and intelligent insights.

Anonymous said...

Discouragement seems to follow whenever we try to do anything outside our comfort zone. Learning to manage it, not avoid it, is the key.

Anonymous said...

This was so on time for me. I spent all weekend listening to depressing music from my high school days, woke up today sad, depressed and with no motivation.

Anonymous said...

Whether tragic events touch your family personally or are brought into your home via newspapers and television, you can help children cope with the anxiety that violence, death, and disasters can cause.

Listening and talking to children about their concerns can reassure them that they will be safe. Start by encouraging them to discuss how they have been affected by what is happening around them. Even young children may have specific questions about tragedies. Children react to stress at their own developmental level.

The Caring for Every Child’s Mental Health Campaign offers these pointers for parents and other caregivers:

* Encourage children to ask questions. Listen to what they say. Provide comfort and assurance that address their specific fears. It’s okay to admit you can’t answer all of their questions.
* Talk on their level. Communicate with your children in a way they can understand. Don’t get too technical or complicated.
* Find out what frightens them. Encourage your children to talk about fears they may have. They may worry that someone will harm them at school or that someone will try to hurt you.
* Focus on the positive. Reinforce the fact that most people are kind and caring. Remind your child of the heroic actions taken by ordinary people to help victims of tragedy.
* Pay attention. Your children’s play and drawings may give you a glimpse into their questions or concerns. Ask them to tell you what is going on in the game or the picture. It’s an opportunity to clarify any misconceptions, answer questions, and give reassurance.
* Develop a plan. Establish a family emergency plan for the future, such as a meeting place where everyone should gather if something unexpected happens in your family or neighborhood. It can help you and your children feel safer.

If you are concerned about your child’s reaction to stress or trauma, call your physician or a community mental health center.

Anonymous said...

I’m going through a struggle starting my own business and it’s shaken my confidence considerably and has me ready to retreat back to my comfort zone. Your blog not only served as a reminder that we all face disappoints and feel discouraged, it also offered practical, sound tips on how to deal with those disheartening situations.

Anonymous said...

Lack of courage seems to be a *major* issue in our society today.. but thankfully one that can be addressed. History has proven time and time again that the power of thought is the seeding point for actions which alter the future in a positive way.

Understanding this, and having the courage to persist without quitting in the face of any obstacle, allows us to accomplish anything.

Anonymous said...

it’s definitely a big help for me since i’m going through a terrible crisis. thnx 4 dis encouraging article for making feel fine. great and good words indeed makes me feel finer. woah…. love this…
hope this will help….

Anonymous said...

One thing that a number of people fails to understand is that failure is an event and (hopefully) a lesson, not a person.

It isn’t important how many times you get knocked down (except perhaps, for the same reason). What’s important is how many times you get back up.

Anonymous said...

Life is full of failures, rejection and more than a fair share of discouragement. I believe that the difference in how persistent people are often comes down to how they handle the discouragement that comes from the same situation.

Anonymous said...

When you feel discouraged to the point of wanting to give up, you can do three things to remedy the situation: reorganize, remember, and resist.

Anonymous said...

Discouragement is a choice. If you choose, you can give in to it. But courageous people simply refuse to be discouraged. They don’t give up, even in the face of fatigue, or frustration, or fear, or failure, because their strength and confidence is found in themselves alone. Courageous people are just ordinary people who are relying on courage.

Anonymous said...

When you're apt to get discouraged the most? When you're halfway through a project. Have you ever painted a room? You get excited choosing the colours, you get the room ready enthusiastically and start painting with energy.


You stop for coffee a third of the way through, and then as you pick up the brush again, your arms start to ache, you notice the drops of paint on the floor and your clothes and you reckon you are only half way. The light begins to fade and you begin to feel weary. You look around at how much you still have to do and remember that even when you have finished, you still have to clear up. And discouragement sets in. Fatigue is the number one cause of discouragement. That is why we leave so many things half finished, incomplete and undone.

Anonymous said...

Hello well for years I wouldn’t let anyone in my study because it had grown out of control. I was so preoccupied with the ministry, teaching, pasturing, training and doing my research, I was too busy to file my folders, prune my papers or sort my shelves of books. I kept putting off the day and got more and more frustrated until there was no natural light through the obscured windows and only a narrow path from the door to my computer.

So last Easter I decided to act. I removed everything from my study and started again. It is now tidy and organised because I moved everything non-essential into the garage where the rubbish has accumulated. I’m slowly selling my unwanted books on Amazon. At least now I don’t have to look at it. The rubbish in your life is anything that distracts you from accomplishing your priorities. Anything that takes your eyes off your mission.
So Juda I think frustration also causes discouragement.

Anonymous said...

The difference between winners and losers is that winners see failure as a temporary inconvenience. Failure doesn’t have to be an end state but can be a learning opportunity.

Anonymous said...

It's easy to feel downhearted. Most of the time, discouragement is the result of not getting our wants met long-term. Most of us can bounce back from disappointment, but when disappointments pile up or there's no sign of hope, that's when pessimism gets a foothold.

Anonymous said...

'Discouragement is an inclination to give up all attempts after the devout life, in consequence of the difficulties by which it is beset, and our already numerous failures in it. We lose heart; and partly in ill-temper, partly in real doubt of our own ability to persevere, we first grow querulous and peevish with God, and then relax in our efforts to mortify ourselves and to please Him. It is a sort of shadow of despair, and will lead us into numberless venial sins the first half-hour we give way to it.' (F. W. Faber).

Reploid said...

Discouragement is an obvious state when things are not working for us. But if we stay in that state things will never work for us. What we have to do is, Think Positively, Smile at your failures and learn from it, Believe in yourself.

Anonymous said...

I like the word "discourage"--it implies a stealing away of courage, a loss of courage. It's even more interesting when you look at it as part of the group of "dis-" words, like dismay, disrespect, disillusioned, or discombobulated. They're fascinating words. But in the case of discourage, we have to ask ourselves--do we ever really lose our courage, or is it just pushed down by something else for a while? When I'm standing at the edge of a tall cliff and my fear of heights kicks in, that doesn't mean that I'm no longer a courageous person. It simply means that at that moment, my fear of heights is stronger than my courage, which I always can feel trying to overcome that fear of heights (though it never seems to succeed!).

So when I'm discouraged, I have to ask myself: Which feeling or emotion is overwhelming my courage right now? How would I be thinking and what would I be doing if this feeling weren't so strong right now? Is it a feeling of having been betrayed? Is it a feeling of uselessness or of failure? Is it the feeling that I'll never do anything right? There are many different feelings that can lessen my courage and make me feel weaker than I truly am.

I have to remember that, though: They make me feel weaker than I truly am.

Discouragement visits all of us from time to time. We all get the feeling that no matter what we do, it's somehow not worthwhile. Our challenge is to accept that feeling for exactly what it is--a temporary state that in no way defines who we are or what we're able to do. If we're able to accept that feeling, we can allow our true courage to come back and take its place, where it truly belongs, and our discouragement will quickly become encouragement. It's not that the negative becomes positive, but that the positive is able to take its true place at the forefront of our lives, our thoughts, and our feelings.

Our value is found in who we are and what we do with that, and if we can continually encourage ourselves, our discouragement will have less space in which to live and grow.

Anonymous said...

I've failed a lot, at many different endeavors. I've come in last place in many things. I've been passed over for promotions, I've lost boards in the army, I've not been hired for the jobs I've applied for. But each time I've been fortunate enough not to allow that failure to keep me from trying. When I lost a board, I came back the next month and won the next one. When I haven't been hired, I've gone elsewhere and applied. When I was turned down by a slew of PhD. programs, I moved to a place I wanted to live and started to work. I've been very blessed, because there's something in my genetic code that gives me the ability to shake off failure--I don't even regard it as failure any more--and move on. But not all people are so fortunate.
So don't be discouraged.

Anonymous said...

How many people do you know who fail in a relationship and then won't have anything to do with anyone afterwards? Or who fail in a tournament and who won't do that sport or activity any more? I suppose one of the most dangerous aspects of that type of behavior is the possibility that such a person is not acting out of fear of failing again, but out of fear of how people will regard them for having failed. SO They got discouraged and prefer to quit sometime.

Anonymous said...

When we can begin to take our discouragement non-seriously,
it means we are ceasing to be afraid of them.
It is of immense importance to learn to laugh at ourselves.

Anonymous said...

Learn how to fail intelligently.

Anonymous said...

Most people don't realize the power of stress and the way it can affect our bodies. Most of us think that the only symptom of stress is that "stressed-out" feeling, the jitteriness and inability to focus and concentrate. But stress is much more insidious than that: it eats away at us, giving us headaches and diarrhea and dizziness and making us want to sleep too much or not letting us sleep enough. And once these symptoms start and we begin to fear a serious physiological disorder, things get worse.
So don't be discourage in life.

Anonymous said...

Once a choice is made, any other possible choices are moot. They can't be made any longer, for the situation never will be the same. A similar selection of choices may present itself in a similar situation, but any choice we make causes change and turns the way things are into the way things were. Many people, though, spend a great deal of time and energy in regret, wishing that they had made a different choice somewhere along the line, wishing that they hadn't chosen the course of action that they chose.As someone said to be discouraged is a choice.

Anonymous said...

Not all of your decisions will be correct. None of us is perfect. But if you
get into the habit of making decisions, experience will develop your judgment
to a point where more and more of your decisions will be right. After all,
it is better to be right 51 percent of the time and get something done,
than it is to get nothing done because you fear to reach a decision.

Anonymous said...

In any moment of decision the best thing you can do is the right thing,
the next best thing is the wrong thing,
and the worst thing you can do is nothing.

Anonymous said...

Over the years I have come to believe that life is
full of unchosen circumstances, that being human
has to do with the evolution of our individual
consciousness and with it, responsibilities for choice.
Pain and joy both come with life. I believe that how
we respond to what happens to us and around us shapes
who we become and has to do with the psyche or the soul’s growth.
We can choose to gather to our hearts the thorns
of disappointment, failure, loneliness, and dismay
in our present situation. Or we can gather the flowers
of God's grace, boundless love, abiding presence,
and unmatched joy. I choose to gather the flowers.

Anonymous said...

It's very easy to fall into the trap of resentment--other people put us in position to do so almost daily when they do things that are unthinking or uncaring. Someone else may get the job or the admission into a school even though you're far more qualified; someone may not invite you to a party to which they've invited everyone else; someone else may meet with great success even though they don't work nearly as hard as we do; someone may say something rude to us or about us behind our backs. But what do all these things mean? These are all other people's actions, reflections of other people's personalities or abilities, yet we allow them to cause us to become resentful.Why allowing them? We should not.

Anonymous said...

There are people who seem to make a life out of worrying, who can't look at anything going on in their lives without finding cause to think that the worst of everything is going to happen, and that it's going to happen to them or to those they love--or both. But these people who worry so much are forgetting some very important life lessons, the most important of which is that worrying doesn't change a single thing, doesn't help a bit.
So why worry?

It's easy to be concerned when someone is about to do something risky. If one of my step-daughters suddenly took off for a third-world country that's plagued by violence without any extra money or security measures, it would be very easy for me to worry about her safety and well-being. There would be many things that could happen to her, and it would be easy to focus on those negative possibilities and worry about her. But my worrying wouldn't do a thing to change her situation, and it would make me rather miserable. And if she called to say hi and I could only talk about how worried I was, I wouldn't be able to support or encourage her at all.

If I suddenly lost my job and didn't have any money in the bank, I most definitely could worry about my finances--I might end up losing my home and many of my possessions, and I could go into debt and ruin my credit rating.

But my worrying wouldn't help the situation at all, and it could negatively impact my health through the stress and strife that I would experience.

Worrying comes when we think of negative future possibilities. It's that simple--we spend time and energy thinking about negative things that could happen, not that have happened. And therefore the energy that were expending usually is wasted because those negative things tend not to come about after all. Mark Twain said that "I am an old man and have known a great many troubles, but most of them never happened," and most of us can relate to this statement. Most of what we worry about never comes to pass, and the time we spent worrying was time and energy wasted.

And even if the worst does come to pass, the worrying didn't do a thing to help make it less difficult, less intense, less negative. We might have spent our time preparing for the outcome rather than worrying about it, but instead we devoted our energy to purely self-centered concern.

Worry is a reflection of a lack of faith that life will be good to us, a lack of faith that God and life are in control and will make our lives full and vibrant. Worry reflects a lack of faith in oneself and in other people to do things that need to be done when they need to be done, and a lack of trust that we'll be able to deal with difficulties when they surface in our lives.

Worry keeps us from helping other people, it causes us many negative results through the stress and strife that it brings, and it wastes a lot of the precious energy that we have in our lives. The only way to combat worry, it seems, is through acceptance--acceptance of the current situations in our lives--and attempting to take positive action to counter the effects of possible negative factors in our lives. Worry doesn't change anything except our own stress levels, and it's important that we leave it behind as soon as we can if we wish to live our lives and our todays fully and completely.

Anonymous said...

Have you ever been around someone whose attitude is constantly negative or critical? Someone who finds something bad about every situation or person in his or her life, and then makes sure to share his or her negative thoughts with everyone else. This type of person can be an extremely negative force in our lives, but have you ever stopped to think what their lives are like? How do they see the world? Can they be enjoying their brief stay on this planet if they're always criticizing and complaining? I don't think discouraging is the only way to solve matters.

Anonymous said...

Discouragement is something we go through for ourselves, something that allows us to make a transition from having to not having. When we grieve, we focus on our loss, our "new" life without this person or this pet or this town or this house. Grief is a healthy response to drastic change, a response that allows us to deal with the pain of loss and get on with our lives.
Many people, though, go through a much longer and stronger grieving period than others, to the point that they make themselves sick or anxious or miserable. This happens most often when we mix in other elements with the grief--regret or self-pity or anger or resentment or guilt are just a few of the emotions or feelings we can add to the grief and take away our love for life, at least for a time. Once we add these elements, grief is no longer healthy, but destructive. It's no longer helpful, but harmful. And the only way around it is to recognize what we're doing.

Anonymous said...

The human being is a surprisingly resilient organism. We impel toward health,
not sickness. Your spirit, as surely as your body, will try to heal.
The question you must ask yourself is not if you will heal, but how. Grief and pain
have their own duration, and when they begin to pass, you must take care to guide
the shape of the new being you are to become.

So you should not fear tragedy and suffering. Like love, they make you more a part
of the human family. From them can come your greatest creativity. They are
the fire that burns you pure.

Anonymous said...

Well I think your Reploid is right. I'm happy you both reconciled. If you ever feel discouraged I think he is there to help you overcome and vice-versa. Are you people married?

Anonymous said...

Criticism brings discouragement sometimes.The way that criticism affects us, though, has very little to do with the criticism itself, the person or people who are criticizing us, or even the way that they're criticizing. Criticism becomes an obstacle to our peace and happiness depending on the way that we take it, and nothing else.

If someone's criticizing me to try to hurt me personally, then that person simply isn't worth me losing my peace of mind over what he or she has done. If on the other hand someone is criticizing me sincerely and constructively, then he or she is trying to help me, and I should look upon their words and actions as help, and nothing else. I should try to learn what they want to teach me with their criticism, and grow because of it.
I usually find that people who are criticizing don't know the whole story behind a certain action or process. Have you ever taken someone to task for not completing a job or a task only to find out that something completely out of that person's control had happened, not allowing them to finish the job? I've criticized my step-kids for treating certain people in ways that seemed poor to me, only to find out that there's much more to the relationships than the little bit that I saw.

If I'm being criticized constructively, I should be thankful that someone is taking the time to teach me, even if they may not do it in the most diplomatic ways possible. The way I react to the criticism will determine how I feel about myself and how I relate to others who are with me, and it's important that I separate the criticism from myself, personally.
But what about the people who constantly criticize others, almost mercilessly? In their cases, the criticism that they're dishing out is the obstacle to their full lives, as people learn very quickly to avoid them at all costs if they don't want to be criticized. These people often don't understand why others don't want to be around them, even as they continue to criticize almost everything that they see. I don't want to spend time with anyone who's going to belittle me and all that I do, so I'll stay away from them as much as I can.
These people also are teaching themselves never to be satisfied. I've known quite a few people like this, too, who seem simply unable to let something be, just as it is. It's either too cold, too hot, too blue, too short, too new or too old. There always has to be something wrong, and they always have to point it out. Can you imagine how sad life would be if you were never able to look at something beautiful, accept it for exactly what it is, and enjoy it?

So criticism can hurt both the receiver and the sender, keeping both from living life as fully as they possibly can. At least the receiver has the option of taking the criticism in a healthy way and not lose his or her peace of mind over it. If one is a constant sender of criticism, though, it's very possible that the person doesn't even recognize the way that he or she is sabotaging his or her ability to be accepting of life and the other human beings with whom we all share this planet.

Anonymous said...

Do what you feel in your heart to be right
for you'll be criticized anyway. You'll be damned
if you do, and damned if you don't.

Anonymous said...

People can be divided into two classes: those who go
ahead and do something, and those who sit still and inquire,
"Why wasn't it done the other way?"

Anonymous said...

There is nothing as easy as denouncing. It don't take much to see that
something is wrong, but it takes some eyesight to see what will bring it right again.

Anonymous said...

It is very unfair to judge
any body’s conduct, without
an intimate knowledge
of their situation.

Anonymous said...

An optimist may see a light where there is none,
but why must the pessimist always run to blow it out?When the aerials are down, and your spirit is covered with snows
of cynicism and the ice of pessimism, then you are grown old,
even at twenty, but as long as your aerials are up to catch the waves
of optimism, there is hope you may die young at eighty.

Anonymous said...

Idleness has long been regarded as an evil, but many people don't realize just why. What's wrong with being idle? What's wrong with hanging around day after day, doing little to nothing constructive? The answer (as with everything else in life) has to do with several things: not having any sense of accomplishment, where your thoughts go when you're idle, and how you get along with others with others when you're idle.
I've gone through several periods of idleness in my life, none of them by choice. I've gone through periods of a month or two with literally nothing to do, being stuck in a city where I knew nobody at all and had no money at all to go to the places where I could meet people. I knew that I wouldn't be around long enough to get a job or get to know anyone well, and I was pretty much stuck in one spot. Those periods have been the most difficult of my life, for those have been the times when I've had the least to do and I've been the least constructive. I've wanted to do something, but I haven't had the resources to get anything done, so I've been kind of stuck, feeling pretty hopeless and useless.

Sociologists find that these feelings are very common among people who are in areas that have very poor economies, where there are high levels of unemployment, or where the jobs are completely unskilled and very repetitious. When I lived in Spain, in an area of almost 20% unemployment, I saw an awful lot of people--especially young men--hanging around, doing nothing. They had no work, and worse, no hope of finding work. They felt hopeless; they felt useless. And they mostly hung around in bars, spending the very little money they had on wine or beer, watching television with their friends. I felt somewhat bad being there, especially since I was a foreigner in their country and I had work, but that was life--I had a skill that they didn't have, and there was no way that they could have done the job I was doing (teaching English).
A life spent making mistakes is not only more honorable
but more useful than a life spent doing nothing.

Anonymous said...

Look at a day when you are supremely satisfied at the end.
It's not a day when you lounge around doing nothing.
It's when you've had everything to do, and you've done it.
Best of luck Medha. From your fan who loves you a lot.

Anonymous said...

Complaining is a difficult topic to cover, for it's often hard to distinguish between complaining and constructive criticism. Without criticism, without a certain degree of discontent, we wouldn't progress at all, we wouldn't have any changes come about to better our lives. But looking at a wrong and calling it a wrong, and simply pointing out a perceived negative aspect of every part of our lives are two different things. I've had times in my life, for example, when things completely beyond my control were going badly, and I've wanted more than anything else to talk them over with someone. When I tried to talk them over with the friends I had at the time, some of them said I was just complaining, and didn't really listen to what I had to say. Because I still hadn't been able to discuss what was going wrong, I would try to talk it over with someone else, with pretty much the same results. What I didn't realize then was that if people aren't going to listen with a sympathetic ear to what you're trying to say, don't talk to those people about problems. They won't understand, because they won't try to understand.

When I finally did find someone to talk with, things got much better, and my desire to talk about the negative things grew less and less as I was able to express myself to some very special friends. I guess the point here is that we should be careful of what we call complaining and what we call venting.
I had one or two problems that I wanted to talk about, but I know people who have millions of them, it seems. No matter what their circumstances, they'll find something to complain about. They might have won $30,000 in the lottery, but it wasn't enough, because with $35,000, they could have paid off their mortgage. And the taxes. . . . I know people who say that it's not worth winning a large cash prize because the taxes are so high. Well, even if the IRS takes 60% of the $30,000, they're still up $12,000 that they didn't have before. Besides, despite all of the negative we hear about the IRS and the government (much of it justified, I'm afraid), most of the money that goes their way goes towards the public good. What better way to spend money?

When I give gifts to these people, I hear "It's beautiful, but what am I going to do with it?" or "It's nice, but I really wanted. . . ." They express little graciousness, if any. Their health is always bad, and things at work are always going poorly. Friends always betray them, or never write, or never call, or never drop by, and when they do drop by, they always pick such an inconvenient time. The new car is great, but let me tell you about the flaws.

I had one or two problems that I wanted to talk about, but I know people who have millions of them, it seems. No matter what their circumstances, they'll find something to complain about. They might have won $30,000 in the lottery, but it wasn't enough, because with $35,000, they could have paid off their mortgage. And the taxes. . . . I know people who say that it's not worth winning a large cash prize because the taxes are so high. Well, even if the IRS takes 60% of the $30,000, they're still up $12,000 that they didn't have before. Besides, despite all of the negative we hear about the IRS and the government (much of it justified, I'm afraid), most of the money that goes their way goes towards the public good. What better way to spend money?

When I give gifts to these people, I hear "It's beautiful, but what am I going to do with it?" or "It's nice, but I really wanted. . . ." They express little graciousness, if any. Their health is always bad, and things at work are always going poorly. Friends always betray them, or never write, or never call, or never drop by, and when they do drop by, they always pick such an inconvenient time. The new car is great, but let me tell you about the flaws.

I had one or two problems that I wanted to talk about, but I know people who have millions of them, it seems. No matter what their circumstances, they'll find something to complain about. They might have won $30,000 in the lottery, but it wasn't enough, because with $35,000, they could have paid off their mortgage. And the taxes. . . . I know people who say that it's not worth winning a large cash prize because the taxes are so high. Well, even if the IRS takes 60% of the $30,000, they're still up $12,000 that they didn't have before. Besides, despite all of the negative we hear about the IRS and the government (much of it justified, I'm afraid), most of the money that goes their way goes towards the public good. What better way to spend money?

When I give gifts to these people, I hear "It's beautiful, but what am I going to do with it?" or "It's nice, but I really wanted. . . ." They express little graciousness, if any. Their health is always bad, and things at work are always going poorly. Friends always betray them, or never write, or never call, or never drop by, and when they do drop by, they always pick such an inconvenient time. The new car is great, but let me tell you about the flaws.

Is life so wretched?
Isn't it rather your hands which are too small,
your vision which is muddled?
You are the one who must grow up.

Anonymous said...

"Sometimes things which at the moment may be perceived as obstacles--
and actually be obstacles, difficulties, or drawbacks--can in the long run
result in some good end which would not have occurred
if it had not been for the obstacle."

Steve Allen

Anonymous said...

"When I was a Boy Scout, we played a game when new Scouts joined the troop. We lined up chairs in a pattern, creating an obstacle course through which the new Scouts, blindfolded, were supposed to maneuver. The Scoutmaster gave them a few moments to study the pattern before our adventure began. But as soon as the victims were blindfolded, the rest of us quietly removed the chairs. I think life is like this game. Perhaps we spend our lives avoiding obstacles we have created for ourselves and in reality exist only in our minds. We're afraid to apply for that job, take violin lessons, learn a foreign language, call an old friend, write our Congressman - whatever it is that we would really like to do but don't because of personal obstacles. Don't avoid any chairs until you run smack into one. And if you do, at least you'll have a place to sit down."

Pierce Vincent Eckhart

Anonymous said...

Do not dwell in the past, do not dream of the future,
concentrate the mind on the present moment.-The Buddha

Anonymous said...

Endurance is one of the most difficult disciplines and when we cannot abide to this then we are discouraged.:(

Anonymous said...

Until we stop ourselves or, more often, have been stopped, we hope to put
certain of life's events "behind us" and get on with our living. After we stop
we see that certain of life's issues will be with us for as long as we live.
We will pass through them again and again, each time with a new story,
each time with a greater understanding, until they become indistinguishable
from our blessings and our wisdom. It's the way life teaches us to live.
I wish you people all the best in life. Keep writing.

Anonymous said...

There are some things you learn best in calm, and some in storm.Learn from your discouragement. Rise up again. Rise up Medha.
By the way you did not answer my question! Are you married to Reploid? Well just being curious. Love you both.Take care.

Anonymous said...

The fact that I was a girl never damaged my ambitions to be a pope or an emperor.Don't let yourself be affected by temporary obstacles. Gather your strenght and wake up. The success is not far.Just don't let your eyes off the goal.

Anonymous said...

One can do only what one can do. But if someone does that each day
he or she can sleep at night and do it again the next day.Anyone who proposes to do good must not expect people
to roll stones out of the way, but must accept his or her
lot calmly, even if they roll a few stones upon it.One who gains strength by overcoming obstacles
possesses the only strength which can overcome adversity.Discouragement is for weak people not for a brilliant writer as you are.

Anonymous said...

Finish every day and be done with it. You have done what you could.
Some blunders and absurdities no doubt crept in; forget them as soon as you can.
Tomorrow is a new day; begin it well and serenely and with too high a spirit
to be cumbered with your old nonsense. This day is all that is good and fair.
It is too dear, with its hopes and invitations, to waste a moment on yesterdays.

Anonymous said...

What I do is all that concerns me, not what the people think. This rule,
equally arduous in actual and intellectual life, may serve for the whole
distinction between greatness and meanness. It is the harder, because
you will always find those who think they know what is your duty better
than you know it. It is easy in the world to live after the world's opinion;
it is easy in solitude to live after our own; but the great person is the one who
in the midst of the crowd keeps with perfect sweetness the independence of solitude.

Anonymous said...

All life is an experiment. The more experiments you make the better.
Don't be affected by any obstacles.

Anonymous said...

Dare to live the life you have dreamed for yourself.
Go forward and make your dreams come true...

Anonymous said...

I do not believe that sheer suffering teaches. If suffering alone
taught, all the world would be wise, since everyone suffers.
To suffering must be added mourning, understanding, patience,
love, openness and the willingness to remain vulnerable.
Grab all these and you will be great.

Anonymous said...

It takes as much courage to have tried and failed
as it does to have tried and succeeded.

Anonymous said...

One cannot collect all the beautiful shells on the beach.
One can collect only a few, and they are more beautiful if they are few.Why are you wasting your time for things which will fade shortly.Enjoy the moments with your loved ones.

Anonymous said...

Confucius said, "If you associate with those who are not centered
in their actions, you will become either too uninhibited or too inhibited.
Those who are too uninhibited are too aggressive,
while those who are too inhibited are too passive."

Anonymous said...

I will have nothing to do with those
who are free but not honest, childlike but not sincere,
straightforward but not trustworthy because if im hurt by them then i will be unhappy and discouraged so better not create such circumstances. I like the way you right.

Anonymous said...

It takes courage to refrain from gossip when others delight in it - to stand up for the absent person who is being abused.
It takes courage to live honestly within your means, and not dishonestly on the means of others.
It takes courage to be a REAL man or a TRUE woman, to hold fast to your ideals when it causes you to be looked upon as strange and peculiar.
It takes courage to be talked about and remain silent, when a word would justify you in the eyes of others, but which you dare not speak because it would injure another.
It takes courage to refuse to do something that is wrong although everyone else may be doing it with attitudes as carefree as a summer song.
It takes courage to live according to your own convictions, to deny yourself what you cannot afford, to love your neighbor as yourself!

Anonymous said...

What today will be like is up to me. I get to choose what kind
of day I will have!

Anonymous said...

What I must do is all that concerns me, not what the people think. This rule,
equally arduous in actual and intellectual life, may serve for the whole distinction
between greatness and meanness. It is the harder, because you will always find
those who think they know what is your duty better than you know it. It is easy
in the world to live after the world's opinion; it is easy in solitude to live after
our own; but the great person is one who in the midst of the crowd keeps
with perfect sweetness the independence of solitude.

Anonymous said...

It is a glorious privilege to live, to know, to act, to listen, to behold, to love. To look up at the blue summer sky; to see the sun sink slowly beyond the line of the horizon; to watch the worlds come twinkling into view, first one by one, and the myriads that no person can count, and lo! the universe is white with them; and you and I are here.

Anonymous said...

If I were as young in years again as I still am inside,
I should make me a list of a few things to do before I die:

To go at least once clear around this jolly world.

To live with savages and in jungles now and then
and learn how splendid they are.

Anonymous said...

It's not enough to have a dream,
Unless you're willing to pursue it.

It's not enough to know what's right,
Unless you're strong enough to do it.

It's not enough to learn the truth,
Unless you also learn to live it.

It's not enough to reach for love,
Unless you care enough to give it.
Take care of yourself.

Anonymous said...

When one door of happiness closes, another opens; but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one which has been opened for us.

Anonymous said...

We must use time creatively. . . and forever realize
that the time is always ripe to do right.
Well some great man said that. I want to tell you and many over there that don't waste time in useless things but do everything you want to. Love you.

Anonymous said...

Show your best face to the mirror, and you'll be happy with the face looking back at you.

Reploid said...

Well mary, we are not married. lol. But we are together that's right. ;-)

Anonymous said...

I wake each morning with the thrill of expectation
and the joy of being alive.
And I'm thankful for this day.

med889 said...

Good morning everyone,

First of all as usual I want to thank all the people who have commented on my post. To read your opinions has always been wonderful for me. It helps me and help many over there who want assistance.

Expressing one's point of view has been appreciated from the very start of my 'little world' I love writing thus I wanted to write and eventually wants to write and get opinions from other people.

I'm still a student however the fact has not weaken me to write about many things around me which I find beautiful.

I wish to tell everyone that life is indeed beautiful and simple.it is an echo..you have to give your best to get a great deal back. I don't deny that sometimes your best is simply not enough but in this case you have to give what is required..not less..not more.

I'm a human being too. I sometimes get easily affected by these temporary obstacles however I keep moving in life. It is not these humps which will let me down in my life. We have to move ahead no matter what the circumstances are.

To mary: Hello dear friend. I humbly apologise for not being able to write to you before. I hope you are O.K. To reply to your quetions then the answer is already given by Reploid.

I again sincerly wish to thank everyone who have given theirs opinions.

Medha.

Anonymous said...

Ah I thought you people are husband and wife.;-)

Anonymous said...

Congrats Medha.You are topping the chart! So many interventions! WoW...Well on my part I would say that its easier to advise,encourage the other party but when it comes to urself....mygod!

Anonymous said...

The way I see it, if you want the rainbow,
you gotta put up with the rain.

Anonymous said...

The happy people are those who
are producing something;
the bored people are consuming
much and producing nothing.

Anonymous said...

Choose always the way that seems the best, however rough it may be;
custom will soon render it easy and agreeable.

Anonymous said...

"What lies in our power to do, lies in our power not to do."

Aristotle

Anonymous said...

We are so vain that we care even for the opinion of those we don't care for.Some people are so intractably vain that when they admit they are wrong
they want as much credit for admitting it as if they were right.
Most of us would be far
enough from vanity
if we heard all the things
that are said about us.

Anonymous said...

Be able to be alone. Lose not the advantage of solitude. When we cannot bear to be alone, it means we do not properly value
the only companion we will have from birth to death--ourselves. We visit others as a matter of social obligation.
How long has it been since we have visited with ourselves?The person who travels alone can start today; but the person
who travels with another must wait until the other is ready. The cure for all the illness of life is stored in the inner depth of life itself,
the access to which becomes possible when we are alone.
This solitude is a world in itself, full of wonders and resources
unthought of. It is absurdly near; yet so unapproachably distant.

Unknown said...

This is really a good topic since most of us is touch by it at one point of time or another..
Sometime,we think that this is the end and that we cannot go on..But somehow we find the courage to keep going..That the beauty of mankind..Whatever the problem, we should always remember that the sun always rises no matter what..Keep going